PC: Mom. Candy and gum rhyme.
Me: No. They don’t.
PC: But they both start with “pink.”
(courtesy of PC’s bestie to her mom)
Bestie’s Mom: Be nice to me. Mommy’s had a really hard day.
Bestie: Is it because People didn’t like your shirt?
PC: Mommy, I have to tell you something. I am feeling whiny today.
PC: Little drips come out of my eyes when I am sad.
PC: Mom, I think I am allergic to juice.
Me: No, you’re not allergic to juice. Why do you think you’re allergic to juice?
PC: I only like orange juice.
(Later) PC: Some of my friends are allergic. What am I allergic to?
Me: Nothing.
PC: Awwww.
PC: Look, I got some lums. (Holding my bra over her chest)
Me: “Lums?” That’s what you call them?
PC: Yes.
Me: Where did you learn that?
PC: At the privacy store… that’s where I get boobies.
Me: You get what — where?
PC: At the privacy store. I get these at the boobie store.
Me: You aren’t using your manners very well. You need to use your manners today.
PC: But they’re asleep.
Me: What’s asleep?
PC: My manners…
PC: (After seeing Chintz’s jewelry mess on the bathroom counter) That’s a lot of goodness gracious! Daddy, daddy, come see what Chintz did. He made a MESS!
PC: I’m really hungry. (We were in JoAnn)
Me: What are you hungry for? Can you wait until we get home?
PC: No! I’m really hungry NOW.
Me: Well, what are you hungry for?
PC: We could go to the Starbucks driveway…
PC: Mommy, I had a boogie and it was on my finger and I got a tissue and put it in the potty.
Me: That’s great! I am so proud of you! (Much better than chasing me around the house with it for ME to put on a tissue and put in the potty.)
PC: Mom. You are always proud of me.
PC: Mom, you look weird!
Me: I look weird? Why do I look weird?
PC: You look weird without your make-up.
PC: Mom, what are those worms on your forehead? (Pointing to my wrinkles)
Me: Thanks Sweet Pea, for helping me make all our goodies last night. You were a really good helper.
PC: Thanks Mom. That’s all the help I’ve got.
PC: Look Mom! That’s where me and Daddy went! (pointing at Hooters)
Me: Okay… So did you like it?
PC: Yes, but they didn’t have milk.
PC: Mom, I want the 300 Tears movie.
Me: The 300 tears? I don’t think I know that one. Where did you see it?
PC: On the commercial. On the pink and blue smashed together. The 300 tears movie.
Me: Pink and blue? Your Barbie movie?
PC: YES! On the commercial. The 300 hundred tears!
Me: Do you mean the Three Musketeers movie?
PC: YES, that one.
PC: (Sneaking into my room past bedtime) Mommy can I tell you something?
Me: Sure, what’s that?
PC: (With shy head tilt) I’d like to be a princess one day.
Me: That sounds like a great idea.
PC: I’d like to turn into a princess and daddy turn into a king and you turn into a princess like me tomorrow. Ok?
PC: Why don’t fishes have eyelashes?
Me: Ummm, I don’t know. That’s a good question. (Insert lame explanation about eyelashes helping to keep dirt out of our eyes)
PC: They need goggles.
Me: Do you want to make a Happy Birthday video for Loden?
PC: Yes! I just have to put my make-up on real fast.
Me: Are you going to take a nap before the party today?
PC: Ummmm, not exactly.
PC: “Mom. Where are we going?”
Me: “The craft store.”
PC: “Mom. What are we making today?”
Me: Silence as my heart melted… and then, “I don’t know yet.”
(About 1 mile later…)
PC: “Mom. Where are we going?”
Me: “The craft store.”
PC: “Ooohhhh. I LOVE that place.”
Upon receiving a frisbee as a birthday party favor, “Mom, look at my new CRISPY”
PC: “I need to get my blonde.” Translation – Blonde = Princess WAND.
Me: “How long have you been awake baby?”
PC: “The sun came up, then my eyes came up.”
PC crying incoherently, I can decipher, “DRAGON” as she is wildly pointing to her toys. Me: “Dragon? You saw a Dragon? Where?”
PC: “Over dare. On da wall.” Darn it, the secret was out and she had witnessed the gecco that has eluded us in the house for weeks.
PC: “Cars go fast, they need a band-aid.”
PC: “My tummy hurts.” (While placing hand on head) “I need a fever.”
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